Outrage at How Gen Z Woman 'Hijacked' Boyfriend's Birthday Dinner

A man's birthday dinner took a shocking turn when his girlfriend used the occasion to stage a surprise marriage proposal—for herself.

In a Reddit post, the man shared how his 27-year-old girlfriend, Sarah, orchestrated a proposal at a restaurant on his behalf, sparking outrage from people online. Since the post was published, it has received 19,000 upvotes.

The OP shared that Sarah insisted on planning his 28th birthday celebration at a nice restaurant with close friends and family. But instead of a standard birthday cake, dessert arrived with an unexpected message: "Will You Marry Me, Sarah?"

"I was completely blindsided," the OP wrote, adding that Sarah then turned to him and said, "Well? This is the best surprise ever, right?"

A woman argues with her partner
A file photo of a couple arguing over dinner. silverkblack/Getty Images

As guests clapped and her friends recorded the moment, he sat in silence. Sarah then said she "knew he wasn't big on grand gestures," but she had grown impatient and decided to take the lead.

At that point, he stood up and told her: "This is my birthday. If you wanted a proposal, you should've talked to me about it first." He then grabbed his things and left.

The backlash from Sarah's friends was immediate, with them blowing up his phone and accusing him of ruining the night and humiliating her when she was only "trying to do something romantic."

Thousands of Redditors, however, rallied behind the OP. One top-voted comment summed up the anger: "She didn't just turn it into a proposal—she turned it into a proposal where she proposed to herself on your behalf! That is not rational behavior in the least."

Another comment echoed similar sentiments. "That's beyond self-centered," they wrote. "She totally hijacked your moment for herself. Huge red flag."

'A Deeper Issue'

Newsweek spoke to Sam MacQuoid, a sex and relationship expert at COEDStore with 40 years of experience, who said that the lack of communication and respect for boundaries in the OP's relationship was alarming.

"This situation, where a marriage proposal unexpectedly interrupted a birthday dinner, highlights a deeper issue: when one partner takes control of a significant moment without mutual discussion, it can feel intrusive and dismissive of the other's needs," he said.

According to MacQuoid, "proposals should be a shared milestone rather than a unilateral decision" and being blindsided in this way likely means that conversations about expectations and timing were never fully had.

"This disconnect can lead to feelings of violation, even if the intention was to express love and commitment," he added.

MacQuoid suggested that the couple needs to have a serious discussion about their future—possibly with the help of a therapist.

"For the individual who walked out, I'd suggest taking time to reflect on your feelings, possibly with the support of a therapist, and then engaging in a calm, honest conversation with your girlfriend," he concluded. "Discuss what you both expect from such significant moments and consider couples counseling to rebuild trust and set clearer boundaries for the future."

Newsweek reached out to u/ExtraSupermarket8858 for comment via Reddit. We could not verify the details of the case.

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About the writer

Maria Morava is a Newsweek reporter based in Edinburgh, U.K. Her focus is reporting on relationships. She has covered news, culture and trends, and entertainment at previous publications. Maria joined Newsweek in 2024 having previously worked at CNN and PinkNews. She is a graduate of the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill and holds an MSc from the University of Edinburgh. You can get in touch with Maria by emailing m.morava@newsweek.com. Languages: English, Albanian.


Maria Morava is a Newsweek reporter based in Edinburgh, U.K. Her focus is reporting on relationships. She has covered news, ... Read more