What Do Your Valentine's Day Posts Say About You?

Valentine's Day has long been a holiday filled with grand gestures, but in the age of social media, the pressure to make it picture-perfect has only grown.

A survey by relationship app Paired, which polled 1,700 people, has revealed how Valentine's Day content affects social media users—and the results highlight a growing concern over online comparison and expectations.

Newsweek spoke to therapist Aly Bullock about where the competition comes from and how couples can enjoy February 14 without feeling the social media heat.

According to the survey, most people aged 18-44 agree that there is an "unspoken expectation" to post about Valentine's Day.

But social media also seems to play a practical role in planning for the day, with nearly half of respondents aged 18-24 saying that online posts provide ideas for gifts or date activities.

How Do Valentine's Day Posts Affect People?

The survey results indicate that not only do people feel the competition to post on social media for Valentine's Day but also their relationships are affected by what they see.

Thirty-nine percent of respondents aged 18-24 and 40 percent of those aged 25-34 agreed that social media content focused on the day sets "unrealistic expectations" for relationships. However, 60 percent of over-55s reported that Valentine's Day content has no effect on them, suggesting a generational divide in perceptions of romance are shaped.

"We tend to measure our relationships against the curated highlights we see on social media, where everything appears perfect and romanticized," Bullock, who is head of relationships at Paired, told Newsweek. "Add in the societal pressure that Valentine's Day must be magical and you have a recipe for unrealistic expectations."

Bullock advised that taking a break from social media during vulnerable times like these can help reduce anxiety and improve mental well-being.

"Studies show that breaks from social media reduce anxiety and depression, increase gratitude and heighten feelings of presence in your life," she said.

Why Do People Post on Valentine's Day?

While it's easy to assume that social media posts about love are purely for show, Bullock says the motivations behind them vary.

"Some people want to promote healthy relationship norms, others might be looking to brag and some are hoping to catch the attention of an ex," she said. "There's no one-size-fits-all reason for why people post about Valentine's Day, so you shouldn't assume anyone's motivation is disingenuous—but don't put too much stock into what anyone is posting, either."

Bullock encouraged self-reflection before sharing content. "Ask yourself: What am I hoping to get out of posting this? Will I be disappointed if I get few likes or comments? If so, then the reason for posting likely has more to do with seeking an ego boost than sharing genuine appreciation for your partner," she said.

Finding a Healthy Balance

Ultimately, Bullock emphasized that there's no right or wrong way to celebrate Valentine's Day, online or offline.

"It's natural to care what others think and want to meet societal expectations," she said. "The goal should be to never care or to avoid conforming altogether, so don't beat yourself up if this is a struggle for you. Self-awareness is the key."

For those who find themselves feeling pressured by Valentine's Day social media trends, she suggested setting boundaries, limiting screen time or focusing on personal, meaningful ways to celebrate—whether that means a heartfelt message to a loved one or a simple, private moment shared between partners.